WHY Confidence is Contagious

There are certain truths to leadership. Every group has a leader.  Good effective leaders have both good character and skill traits.  The group will take on the personality of their leader.  Here is a great article on VCU Head men's basketball coach Shaka Smart a well respected and successful leader.  The five core values of his program are appreciation, enthusiasm, competitiveness, unselfishness, and accountability.  He breeds confidence and a positive growth mindset everyday into his players and his staff.  http://sportsworld.nbcsports.com/the-tao-of-shaka/

It is easy to see WHY Shaka is a leader and WHY people follow him.  The WHY of your leadership philosophy is your foundation.  We all usually spend a lot of time on how to lead but first we must know WHY we lead! Here are a few of my personal WHYs.

1.          Why are you a leader?

a.     PG

b.     Experience

c.      To grow myself and others. Demand the best from myself and those around me.

d.     Constant pursuit of professional and personal growth. 

e.     Willing to do the hard work and willing to fail and learn.

     2.          Why should people follow you?

a.     Want to learn, grow, and be challenged.

b.     Character: loyal, honest, hard work, trustworthy, fun, positive, honest

c.      Skill: development, experience in all facets of basketball, think ahead, initiative, prepared, resourceful

d.     Mindset: Grit, Guts, Gumption
e.   Care about others well being both personally and professionally

     3.          Why is Leadership important?

a.     Guides others through life and life decisions

b.     Guides family

c.      Establish Core values and vision

d.     Direction

e.     Defines Character

f.      Discipline

g.     Maximizes potential

h.     Demands excellence

i.       Significance vs success

j.       Empower, Mentor, Teach, Lead, Breed confidence

k.     Teach skill and character

WHERE is your leadership?

So far we have covered WHO, WHAT, WHEN, and today we look at the WHERE questions of your leadership philosophy. 

The WHO questions should of helped you define the type of person you are and WHO you want to lead and learn from.

The WHAT segment hopefully helped you define your role, your followers needs, and WHAT you believe about leadership.

Your WHEN answers should have helped you define times WHEN you are a good leader and times WHEN you need to be more effective.

Now it is time to reflect on WHERE you want to be a leader and WHERE  you need to grow as a leader. I have included a few of my personal answers to the questions.  I hope you are enjoying the process of developing your leadership philosophy. 

Here are the 4 WHERE questions:
 

     1.     Where are you a leader?

a.     Work

b.     Family

 

     2.     Where do you want to be as a leader?

a.     Be more polished and confident as a public speaker

b.     Head Coach

c.      Confident-Sure-Bold-Effective manager of people

     3.     Where do I need to grow in order to be where I want to be?

a.     Professional Network-network up

b.     Experience as Head Coach and decision maker

c.      Keep growing as a leader/teacher/mentor/coach

d.     Personal growth

     4.     Where do I want to take my group?

a.     PGs: vocal, confident, lead by example, close knit, trusting, maximize potential as players, leaders and people

 

The 3 WHENs of Leadership

Part of being a good leader is knowing what your strengths and weaknesses are and surrounding yourself with people who compliment those areas.  So far we have discussed the WHO and WHAT of developing your leadership philosophy, today, we are going to address the WHEN. 

Understanding WHEN you are at your best and WHEN you are not can help you recognize the areas you need to improve in as a leader and in what areas you excel. Also, understanding your WHEN helps you know what situations you may not be the most effective leader you can be.  You may also learn that you thrive during crisis situations!  Take some time and really be honest with yourself about when you are an effective leader and when you are not.  I have included a few of my personal answers to the questions down below. 

 

     1.     When do you need to lead?

a.     Teaching new concept.

b.   Group lacks direction.

c.   Feel uncertain or unsure on next steps. Help organize and create action plan.

d.   Group lacks confidence and needs a boost.

e.      Finding a solution to a problem.

 

     2.     When are you most effective at leading?

a.     When overprepared and clear plan.

b.     Comfortable with material.

c.      When things need positive vibe.

d.     When things get hard or tough.

     3.     When are you least effective when leading?

a.      Not confident in what teaching or feel unprepared.

b.     Teaching people who don’t care or listen.

c.     When angry.

d.      When task I don’t want to do or indifferent about.

 

The 5 WHAT questions

Hopefully you have spent some time thinking about the WHO questions of your leadership philosophy.  Remember the key to building anything great and sustainable is to have a solid foundation.  With that in mind let's discover more about the 5 WHAT questions needed to develop your leadership philosophy.   Take some quiet time to reflect and enjoy the process!  I have included a few of my own personal WHAT answers. 

     1.     What is your role?

a.     Make my boss' job easier and support decisions.

b.     Mentor younger coaches/peers/former players.

c.      Encourage, support and maximize potential of players mentally, physically & emotionally.

     2.     What do your followers need?

a.     Players: time, love, energy, direction, discipline, basketball skill set, life skills, emotional support

b.     Coaches: professional & personal growth, how to be a professional, direction, goals, mentors

     3.     What are your strengths?

a.     Continual Learner

b.     Consistent

c.      Calm, collected, fun

d.     Trust, loyal, respectful, professional

     4.     What are your weaknesses?

a.     Communication:can be too short on words  

b.     Controlled emotions: lack of immediate reaction can be seen as aloof

c.      Network Up better 

     5.     What do you believe to be true about Leadership?

a.     Leadership is about People

b.     Leadership is about relationships. People have to know you care, are competent and trustworthy.

c.     Groups want discipline and consistent accountability principles.

d.     Hard conversations usually lead to growth.

e.     There are different types of leadership styles:  by example, energy, vocal, & by position-title.

f.       For effective leadership everyone involved in the group has to be willing to receive info & communicate out.

g.     All groups have a leader.

h.     Everyone needs a coach and a cheerleader.

i.       Time and tone are important.

j.       Catch people doing things right.

k.     Praise publicly and criticize privately.

WHO are you?

The purpose of the next few blogs is to help you develop your leadership philosophy.  We will be breaking down the WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHY, and HOW of leadership into smaller pieces to jump start your thinking.

Today we are going to reflect on the WHO questions.  Again, I strongly encourage you take some time and write down your answers. This should be an ongoing process as you develop your leadership philosophy.

Who are you? 
Who are you as a person? As a coach?  What principles guide you in your daily life? Motivations?

Here a couple of things from my personal list to give you an idea:
People first. Relationships are important to me. Make and find time for others.

Golden Rule: treat and talk to others as you would like to be treated.

Character: hard worker, loyal, trustworthy, giver, take initiative, resourceful, problem solver, prepared, fun, love to learn & grow, confident with humility

Skill: Teacher, leader, mentor, listening, compassion, empathy, demanding, personal and professional development

Who do you lead?
You can lead in many different areas.  Consider your roles at home, in the community, within your family and at work.

Who do you follow?
Thought leaders
Boss
Family
Mentors
Spiritual

Would love to hear any questions or please feel free to share any comments as you go about developing your leadership philosophy.  Hope you find the process helpful.

Chris Widener's Leadership Philosophy

 

 

Do you know who you are as a leader? What do your followers need from you as a leader? When are you most effective when leading?  Where do you want to be as a leader? Why should people follow you?  How does your group need to be lead?

 

Over the next two weeks I will be posting blogs that will break down the WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, WHY and HOW of leadership into smaller pieces.  My hope is that you will take the time between posts to explore your own answers to these questions.  The purpose is to help you create a strong foundation of your leadership philosophy and principals. 

 

The program I will be sharing with you is from Chris Widener's Extraordinary Leader's 13 CD set. 

His program has really helped me define who I am as a leader and where I want to be as a leader.  I think before we begin the process we have to first understand what his philosophy of Leadership is.

 

 

Chris Widener’s Philosophy on Leadership   
Every group has a leader-a primary influencer(s).    
If you have 2 leaders then you will have 2 groups.

 

     Every group needs a “good” leader.

Can have a position/title leader but that does not make them a good leader.

Any person that has influence is a leader.

If there are not good leaders in your group then you need to make them good leaders.

     Effective leadership is character and skill.

     Leadership is long term.

     People choose to follow based on character and skills.

          Nice guys= good character & little to no skills

          Charlatan= poor character & good skills

          Short term leadership=poor character & excellent skills

 

      Leadership is based on relationships.

      Followers must have attachment to your character or your skills.

 

      Leadership is an opportunity; a given chance to make the world better for others,
      to lift others up, & to grow others

      Leadership is a responsibility: to make things better.

      Leadership is a privilege: attitude to gratitude.

      Leadership is for other people.

      Leadership must be BOLD!

      Dare to dream. Take risks. Bold decisions= bold actions.

     You want to cause action with greater commitment.
     Attempt to do great things.

      For Leadership to be effective long term it needs to be methodical, consistent, & purposeful.
Leadership must keep the group focused on the vision.
The natural tendency of a group is to move away from mission/vision/purpose.
Must be constant reminders of the vision.

 

Leadership by Jim Rohn

I just received my complete set of Jim Rohn's Guides and I am really looking forward to diving in to some new material.

Starting next week I am going to start a series on how to develop your Leadership Philosophy based on the teaching of Chris Widener a disciple of Jim Rohn.

I have found http://www.success.com to be a great resource to purchase materials and to find articles, links, checklists, videos and blogs.  I also appreciate that the site runs a lot of regular sales and discounts on material. I will make sure and promote the next sale on my twitter @coachkarenblair if you are interested in stocking up on some new personal and professional growth materials. Also, if you are interested in the Jim Rohn set you can find it at The Success Store.

Here are just a few sample quotes from the Guides:

A life best lived is a life by design. Not by accident, and not by just walking through the day careening from wall to wall and managing to survive. That's okay.  But if you can start giving your life dimension and design and color and objectives and purpose, the results can be staggering.

From The Jim Rohn Guide to Goal Setting

Be strong but not rude.
Be kind but not weak.
Be bold but not a bully.
Be humble but not timid.
Be thoughtful but not lazy.
Be proud but not arrogant.
Have humor without folly.

From The Jim Rohn Guide to Leadership

If you have read the series and have a favorite please leave me a comment and I will make sure and start with that one!

Maximizing Potential

 You can find John Maxwell's new book "Good Leaders Ask Great Questions" at
https://www.johnmaxwell.com/store/products/Good-Leaders-Ask-Great-Questions.html

 

This is part 2 of some great notes shared with me from Lindsay Scarlatelli at the University of Miami Ohio from "An Evening with John Maxwell" event she was able to attend.

Over the past few months I have really been trying to dive into my own personal purpose and Why.
On this quest I have loved learning so many new things.  I finally got to a point where I had to stop for a few days and really study the topics and figure out how to implement them into my daily life and routines.  That is why when he talks about having a plan for growth and being intentional really stuck out to me. So with that being said, what is your plan for growth this year?

I am going to continue to spend the time in my car listening to audio books and podcasts to continue my growth.  If you have some great recommendations please let me know.  I will be sharing with you over the next few weeks some really inspiring and motivating ideas I have come across.

I love it when coaches are willing to share.  I have gained a lot of valuable insight just from sharing book notes and speaker notes with Lindsay over the past 6 months.  My reading pile is high with great stuff.  My goal is to find more time to read on the road this year.  Of course, after all my film is watched!

How to grow to your maximum potential.

"Most people accept their life, few people weed their life."

To be successful, you need to know who you are what your purpose in life is.
Once you understand it, you need to be committed to growing in that area.

Have a plan for growth. You don't grow automatically, you don't automatically get better. 
Don't assume as we get older,  we get better.

You have to be intentional with your growth.

It's not what you say, it's what you ask.

Questions unlock the door to every opportunity that you want in life.

The better questions you ask, the better the answers you get.

The better questions you ask,  the better direction you have and the more success you have.

Purpose and Passion

Thank you to Lindsay Scarlatelli for sharing her notes from a recent road trip to attend "An Evening with John Maxwell" featuring Matthew Mitchell in Lexington, Kentucky.

Matthew Mitchell
Take your mind off the surface things and get your mind into substance
Who do you want to be?
The only way you become a leader is to pursue a path of personal excellence.

One of my personal goals this year has been to focus a lot on To Be goals versus To Do goals.
As I have focused on being a better person it is naturally helping me be a better leader. 


John Maxwell
Success means different things to different people.
It is impossible TO BE successful without discovering your purpose.
When you discover why you were born, you will find your purpose.
Your Why is your purpose. Discover it--don't spend life lost.

Two paths to discovering your purpose

70% success rate: Discover your passion. Normally leads to your purpose.
Passion gives energy.
People talk about high energy and low energy people. There is no such thing. There are people with passion and people without passion.
Passion is the fuel that will take you where you want to go.
Passion is contagious.
Energy attracts energy.
No one has to motivate or encourage you. It is only work when you would rather be doing something else.
Caution: it is possible to be passionate at something you are not good at

100% Success Rate: Passion plus giftedness/ability/strengths
What do I do well?
What brings me great return?
Discover it and work on it. Work on your strengths and not on your weaknesses.
People don't pay for average. Average never changes a life or inspires anyone. If you work on your weaknesses you will on be average.
To be successful you have to get in the top 20%.

 

Mentally Tough Teammate

 

 

Here is some great locker room material for your team.

Thanks to Gonzaga Women's Basketball for sharing this in their Whiteboard Session.

The Whiteboard Initiative was started by the WBCA and NACWAA to encourage professional development sessions. I encourage WBCA coaches to get involved and host a session. Get involved in your community and help develop coaches in your area.

You can find more out at

http://www.wbca.org/pages/EDUCATION_whiteboard

or please feel free to contact me to find out more information.

I hosted an event two years ago with over 40 people in attendance.

If you build it, they will come!!

Carrot, Egg, or Coffee Bean

 This is one of my favorite stories of all time.  I first heard this from Coach Mike Neighbors at the University of Washington.  So which one are you?

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see."

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this: Which am I?

Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.

When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, how do you respond? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches. May we all be coffee!

Characteristics of Greatness

http://donyaeger.com

To be an effective leader you must know Why you are doing something.

Then you have to know What you want to do.  What is your vision?

Next is planning HOW you are going to do it.

Don Yaeger's 16 Characteristics of Greatness shows us HOW great leaders think, prepare, work and live. 

Leadership is about influencing people.  People follow leaders based on their character and skill set. You can go to Don's website and learn in more detail about each characteristic or sign up for his free monthly newsletter that talks more about each characteristic.  Make sure you are spending time developing and protecting your culture everyday!!

How They Think

1.  It’s Personal

   They hate to lose more than they love to win.

2.  Rubbing Elbows

   They understand the value of association.

3.  Believe

   They have faith in a higher power.

4.  Contagious Enthusiasm

   They are positive thinkers… They are enthusiastic… and that enthusiasm rubs off.

   How They Prepare

5.  Hope For the Best, But…

   They prepare for all possibilities before they step on the field.

6.  What Off-Season?

   They are always working towards the next game…

7.  Visualize Victory

   They see victory before the game begins.

8.  Inner Fire

   They use adversity as fuel.

   How They Work

9.  Ice In Their Veins

   They are risk-takers and don’t fear making a mistake.

10.  When All Else Fails

    They know how – and when – to adjust their game plan.

11.  Ultimate Teammate

    They will assume whatever role is necessary for the team to win.

    How They Live

12.  Not Just About the Benjamins

    They don’t play just for the money.

13.  Do Unto Others

    They know character is defined by how they treat those who cannot help them.

14.  When No One Is Watching

    They are comfortable in the mirror… they live their life with integrity.

15.  When Everyone Is Watching

    They embrace the idea of being a role model.

16.  Records Are Made to Be Broken

    They know their legacy isn’t what they did on the field. They are well-rounded.

Team Culture

 

I have been spending time this week reviewing my notes from the WBCA/NACWAA Whiteboard session we hosted at the Unviersity of North Texas and I wanted to share some great points and ideas that LeTourneau University Head Coach Leslie Reinecker shared with the group about culture.


Culture is a pattern of shared assumptions invented, discovered, or developed by a group as it learns to cope with its problems by external adaption and internal integration.

Cultures form out of common ideas/beliefs.

Developing culture is intentional and continuous.

Championship Cultures have great respect among team members and they take pride in fulfilling team roles.

Help players develop their Why. Coaches do not be afraid to share your story and Why.
Young players usually have not greatly developed their why/story yet. Help them shape theirs.

Inspire players to work.  This will help determine long term success.

Leaders must live/participate in the core values consistently.

Constructive feedback is the only kind that helps the team. All other types just tear down the culture.

Players are always more sensitive to criticism than to compliments.  You give them 10 compliments but they always remember the 1 criticism.  Be aware because your less mature players will turn that into a reason "why you don't like them." Don't let this become a trust killer.

Team Culture is about building relationship and trust.

Know that incoming players are products of previous cultures. Change takes time and consistently.

Players are always watching you.

YOU MUST WIN THE LOCKER ROOM BEFORE YOU CAN CONSISTENTLY WIN ON THE COURT.

You will see your team's true culture when things go badly.

There is no magic time frame when creating a successful team culture but generally it takes a minimum of 3 years.

Leaders it is your responsibility to shape and model the program you want.  You get what you tolerate.

"The maintenance of a culture is ongoing process that require regular effort. The effort is worthwhile, though, particularly when you take into account just how much culture dictates behavior, focus, ethic, and results. Culture is a powerful component of every organization, and to a certain extent it take on a life of its own." Joe Frontiera and Daniel Leidl in Team Turnarounds

Most coaches want to focus on changing something physical rather than mental because it is easier. Working the mental side is more work, but gives better results.

You have to have a strategy but it is the culture that determines whether or not that strategy will be successful.

Time spent on X's and O's is very important but wins or losses are based on aspects of the team's culture.  The team's attention to detail, effort, players' ability to execute together. During times of high pressure players will fall back on their habits.  

Relentless Challenge

http://attackathletics.com/product/relentless/

I came across this Blog post by Darren Hardy today in my daily reading and wanted to share his thoughts from Tim Grover's book Relentless.  As we are at the start of the season I think it would be a great 30 day challenge to live like a cleaner!  You can find this blog post and others at  http://darrenhardy.success.com/2014/10/relentless-pt-2/#article

BE RELENTLESS PART 2

In last week’s post, I shared with you my interview with Tim Grover, author of  Relentless – From Good to Great to Unstoppable.

In the interview, he goes over the topic of the cleaner and how in a cleaner’s mind, there is NO failure.

Let me re-read you Tim’s definition of a “cleaner.”

Ready? Okay, here goes:

A cleaner is an individual who keeps pushing himself HARDER than anyone else.
He’s never satisfied, there’s always MORE to do.
He knows EXACTLY who he is.

He doesn’t need to have other people pat him on the back, tell him what a great job he’s doing.
He or she actually prefers the SILENCE.
Because they don’t need that.
They don’t need that external to get them going.
They’re never intimidated by pressure – they THRIVE on it.

They LOOK for those situations.
They look for those pressure situations so they can conquer them.
They don’t let the pressure get to them.

A cleaner never competes against anyone else.
Their main competition is themselves.
They don’t worry about what everybody else doing.
It doesn’t matter.
It doesn’t even occur to them to have it matter.

The hardest person to compete against is yourself because no matter what you do, you’re never gonna be able to beat that person inside… but you can make them better. And let me show you how.

Over the next 30 days , challenge yourself to live like a cleaner.
Let you relentless, unstoppable, and BEST self come alive by doing these four things:

1. Work HARDER than anyone else
… harder than anyone expects or can even imagine.
Jump full on, head in.

2. Know who you are. 
Don’t look for accolades, acknowledgment, thank you’s or praise.
Prefer the silence.
You are doing what you do for YOU, no one else.

You hold a standard of excellence not for the recognition, but because that’s who you are… and external praise is needless.

3. Look for pressure situations.
Test yourself.
Subject yourself to those situations that challenge you… if only for the thrill to see what you are made of. Have pressure ignite you… force you to dig deep and tap resources you’ve had dormant for sometime.

Thrive on pressure over the next 30 days.

4. And lastly, only compete against yourself. 
Your greatest competition is the person you are capable of being.
Your greatest self is way more competition than anyone else can be.

Write THAT down.
Describe your greatest self… that one deep inside you that would emerge if you didn’t submit to fear, weakness and apprehension. Describe your best self on your best day.

Now go compete with that person.
No doubt THAT person will give you a run for your money.
And hey, you just might get close… if you do, your competition will be dumbfounded, if not downright decimated.

Then they will call you… a legend.
When in actuality, you just, FINALLY, let your true potential shine.

So if you are up to taking this challenge, declare it publicly – to your friends, your family, your team, in the comments below, and even on my Facebook page! Let’s see what success can come from this over the next 30 days.